Friday, September 16, 2011
So I am Canadian. I am more Canadian than most people I know. In fact, I think I am more Canadian than ALL people I know. I'm serious. I can trace my mama's family history back to Spanish John Macdonell, who basically got pissed off at England owning Scotland (post-Culloden), and he was one of the main Canadian signatures on some official documents. And then there's my Dad's family, who were bakers in Bristol, UK, who decided that they were stuck where they were, and they moved to Canada to be amongst the wilderness and hang out with some Indians (his word not mine!, as written in a 1914 letter home).
The irony is that many of my family has passed through the States en route to Canada, decided they didn't like it, and they moved north. Which I suppose has done my fam really well so far.. until me.
I spent my childhood pining for New York City. All I wanted was a chance to live there and work there. Vancouver was like, been there done that. And then 9/11 happened and suddenly any hope I had of living there under the radar evaporated.
I am Canadian. I like to play it safe. I like to ask permission before I do anything out of the ordinary. Also, I am from Vancouver. So suffice it to say i run a little bit slower than the rest of the pack.
I have a cousin, from Hamilton, ON, who was born in Portland, because his dad (a doctor) was doing some residency in the States and was there for only a matter of WEEKS. And because of that, he can live anywhere in the States he'd ever want to and the customs operators will hold out their arms and say, Welcome Home, we can't wait for you to pay our taxes! And yet when I show up... it's, "hi, come spend money here for 6 months, but ope, don't you dare stay any longer! Or you'll get deported and blacklisted! Ok welcome here's a list of hotels!"
And I am pining--aching-- to leave and work in different countries, to add to their value as a society, to bring my education and work experience and zeal for life to their economy, to spend my hard-earned money purchasing their very expensive organic, gluten-free, vegan products and perhaps one day investing in their real estate market.
A very good girlfriend of mine is from a tiny town outside of Chicago. She is one of the most talented, professional, and sweet makeup artists I have ever met. She came to Vancouver just about 2 years ago to attend a 1-year program at VFS. And she fell in love with this city and met a great boy from Columbia who also loves this city. And they are fighting, FIGHTING, tooth and nail, to stay here. She just got employed in a dreaded full-time office job -- that doesn't really give much time for her to pursue her passion -- simply because they will give her residency here. She is giving up time from her life to work in something she doesn't really believe in because she so wholly believes in her place in Vancouver and one day as a sought-after makeup artist in Van.
But here is this amazing, talented, kind chicka who just wants to live, work, and pay taxes in Vancouver, but she was born south of the border, and therefore our government makes it insanely difficult for her. And here's me, very educated and with much work experience, and all I wanna do is book that flight to NYC and be a starvin actress who pays her rent on time and serves people food or answers phone calls in the daytime... and the US government makes it very clear that to try without a visa or green card would mean that I'm obviously a terrorist. For god's sakes, I'd even pay for my own medical bills!!! Did I mention that I look and talk the same as your average Yank?? I've even started to say "PRAH-cess" instead of "PROH-cess", and "SAW-ree" instead of "SOH-ree".
We live in a time of CHANGE. 2012, Yes We Can, a black president and a white prime minister who holds kittens for photo ops. Gay marriage is legal in many places and I can make cheap-to-free phone calls as long as I have internet access. A lot of the Star Trek gadgets are becoming commonplace items to have (iPad anyone!), and more and more people work from home or abroad because we are all connected through the Internet.
And yet... if I spend more than 6 months in the US or UK without a visa or sponsorship, I may be deported with no chance of ever seeing that country again. C'mon world, just because my parents, grandparents, great-grandparents, great-great-grandparents... and so on and so forth for at least 7 generations, never wanted to leave the land of maple trees and angry french people, doesn't mean that I shouldn't get a CHANCE.
It's my -- our -- generation that is to be the next leading force in the world. Please, I ask of you, help us to lax up these laws. We've gotten so fear-driven - might i even say, paranoid - that we are stunting our growth as a society. And yes, I realize there are reasons for laws. I'm sure there are many out htere who will gladly argue with me as to the importance of these laws.
But for heaven's sake: NO, I'm not a terrorist. NO, I won't take jobs from your average American (if anything I'll just trade with the ones who want to move to Canada!) YES, I will add to your society and YES you will love me.
Sunday, May 1, 2011
I highly recommend any of you, considering to take a week to Shape-Up your life, to take a "Do-It-Now" Week. It really is amazing what the universe will throw towards you.
So many events have happened it's tough to put it in words... but namely, a 24-hour film festival, a great film class, and ideas that I've been tossing around are starting to come into fruition. How cool is THAT! I'm getting so busy that my days are starting to fill up, so I really must be aware of what I am manifesting, and to ensure I'm taking time for myself, my relationship, and namely growth... but life is good. I'm also too busy to get in all of my Daily Actions still... but I've been ensuring to check in with gratitude daily. That is the big one I feel I cannot drop.
Next week is confidence week. Each day, I will give myself a little "I am confident" affirmation... "What Would _____ (insert confident woman icon in my life here) Do?"
I will also OFFICIALLY announce... that I am launching my Arbonne Business as an Individual Consultant! Woo hoo!!! So if any of you are just DYING for some awesome possum product... at least give 'er a once over... www.meganphillips.myarbonne.ca
OK. Here's confidence vibes to everyone... Let's ROCK Week 13... only a few more weeks to go... like 4 weeks or something ridiculous. Final sprint will begin soon!
Love and hugs,
Posted by Megan Phillips at 10:20 PM
Tuesday, April 26, 2011
So, admittedly. I have been BAAAD. In fact, it was a facebook message from a friend that caused me to even consider writing this blog because I tell you.... since my tonsillectomy, Sundays kept coming and going faster and faster until finally we were approaching the last Sunday in April and... it's been almost 2 months since I've posted. That's like, half this challenge?!
So that is Megster dropping the ball. And I won't lie. I've been dropping the ball concerning Morning Pages, a little bit with food awareness, meditation, and nature appreciation. HOWEVER. The remaining activities, I have never felt more excited about. In fact, I honestly feel that the work I did in Jan/Feb/March has led me to a place where I feel more pumped than I've felt in a WHILE. By the graces of all the incredible people and energies that have guided/pushed/pulled me places... I am SO full of gratitude.
OK so I've also not been paying attention to my weekly themes... recently... and that, I accept responsibility for. Once again, I am demonstrating a pattern of throwing myself out the gate at 650 mph, then getting exhausted 10 minutes later and lying down until the race is over.
However... as growth and changes happen... I suppose the good thing is that THIS race, the "120 days to change" race, is NOT over! (that's why I gave myself 4 months peeps -- cuz I knew that a slump was totally inevitable and I wanted to give myself time to burst forth with new energy!).
And I will say this. Yes, this is a pattern of mine... to start strong and finish last (if I finish at all)... HOWEVER. As I mentioned, I truly believe that the last 3 months of work have culminated in all of the exciting opportunities that have been showing themselves to me recently (too numerable to mention them all... but they involve employment, creative, physical, and financial /career areas). And due to these wonderful opportunities and showering of unexpected gifts (ummm, yeah I'm talking to you, unexpected cheque-in-the-mail-from-the-government!), I have truly been focussing my time and effort on growing those little seeds into the beautiful fauna that they have the potential to be.
So instead of regretting the past. I focus on the present, and the final quarter of this AMAZING adventure I've been riding on (and you who've been doing it with me). And -- full circle (could it be any other way??) -- how fitting that the one week I get a reminder email from this dear friend, is the week of DO IT NOW.
So I challenge you -- any readers out there -- to inspire yourself, and perhaps a few others around you -- to spend this week just frickin' DOING IT! Because what are you waiting for? I was recently listening to a speaker, and she said that she was given an opportunity that she felt in her bones of bones was right for her, yet there was some fear blocking her before she jumped in. And she asked herself then -- as I ask you now -- "If I keep doing what I'm doing the same way I'm doing it, where will I be in 5 years time?"
I"ll ask it again.
"If you keep doing what you're doing right now, where will you be in 5 years time?"
And hey, maybe that will be the promotion you are working HARD at achieving, with the steps you've set out for yourself along the way. Awesome!!! Keep following that path, baby!!! Or maybe - as I was feeling recently - seeing yourself in the same position you're in now is the most horrible, soul-sucking, life-threatening thing possible. And yet you haven't made any changes.
So what change can you make... NOW? Big or small, doesn't matter.
I'd love to hear your choices... because they inspire me!
Speaking of which... committing to being on time and all... here I go. Love and light and hugs.
Posted by Megan Phillips at 11:17 AM
Sunday, March 13, 2011
OK you don't understand -- well how could you, you can't read my mind (can you?!) -- let me back up a little bit. I'll explain in a sec. FIRST, let me do a quick recap:
IN SUM: <-- ooh, that sounds kinda official doesn't it? I like it ;) Ok. Seriously. So after last week, the totally uninspired, i-feel-icky-and-watched-tv-all-day week, this week was like a COMPLETE reversal. Thank the heavenly beings that Be!
PHYSICAL BODY: I am -- miraculously -- the same weight as in Week 2. woo! I've been super committed to doing exercise every day -- be it gym, yoga, or swimming. I feel supported, and I feel like body and I are slowly becoming pals again. That's very exciting.
Upcoming, I will be healing from tonsil surgery so I intend to be very easy on myself, and just focus on the visualization and mind-healing, and treating my body with nourishing food and gentle exercise over the coming weeks.
HEALTH & ENERGY: It has been an INSPIRATIONAL weekend. I was volunteering at this event called the I Can Do It! Conference, it featured a whoooole bunch of inspirational teachers and authors who have guided me and my ankle to the incredible place I'm in now. To see them -- real, live people -- speaking up there, as well as having spent the weekend with a great pal who is clearly a soul-friend that I was supposed to meet on set last week was a gift.
Upcoming, I hope to have the energy to do just one little thing on the to-do list daily. Tuesday might be a gong show, and depending on how the pain is wed-friday, I'm aware I may not have the energy... but it would be pretty cool if I were able to get started on cleaning my desk or sorting through the itunes.
CREATIVE ACCOMPLISHMENTS: HANG UP THE PHONE PEOPLE MEGAN HAS BEEN WRITING. And not just random little ditties I'll never show anyone: I have been writing real scripts, with a friend. I have also had a few ideas for musical and song ideas (inspired by this weekend!), so who knows where we'll go with that. Upcoming this week, it would be awwwesome if I could do a little bit each day. I may ask my stepmom to bring my guitar over from my parent's place... who knows... maybe I'll write a little ditty?
SELF-ESTEEM: Yup, this week has done wonders. I neglected to mention that I have taken this week to not watch TV. Although it has been harrrd in some ways, I really do think that taking time away from the boob tube has contributed to an overall feeling of achievement, which has blossomed through to taking time to write, and sing, and do happy dances, and meet people.
It's also helped that there have been no new episodes in ANY of my favourite shows. Not that I've checked.
Upcoming, I honestly feel like the only achievement/self-esteem I need to live up to is healing, meditating with my new meditation CDs (!) daily, and anything else will be a bonus!
FINANCES & CAREER: This one has been stumping me. I feel I'm in this limbo performing-wise, because of the upcoming surgery and the recent voice issues. My "biz venture" ideas that have been coming with alacrity have been leaving with an equal fervor. I'm broke. I'm sorry universe -- I know I shouldn't state things as I don't like it because it's an affirmation -- but I've just gotta say it like it is -- I'm BROOOOOOOKE!
Upcoming... I just don't know. I'm keeping with the creative, and tonight i'm listening to a sweet-as meditation from a lady who apparently has done some great work in the past... I'm open, and I'm ready, and I'm learning about what to do and change.
MENTORS: I've had about 4 mentors in mind all week -- all of which are peers, and it's like I carried them around on my shoulder in different situations. I would see how one of them acted in a situation, and I pretended to act like them. I think that has been a major factor in helping me overcome watching TV daily, as well as improving my activity and eating from last week. I'm aware I still have a long way to go but -- as one of my mentors would say -- focus on your successes and live in the moment. Also, this weekend has been TOTALLY mentor-stacked with the conference, so yay!
THIS WEEK: OK. So at the beginning of this blog, the vomit-in-the-mouth thing, let me explain.
So one of the speakers I watched - Caroline Myss - what a freaking lady. She talked about many things today... but mostly, that we carry around 12 different archetypes in our psyche. Some of them we're proud of, like the Goddess and the Charismatic Child and all that. But then there are some we like to pretend we don't have... like the Sabateur, the Gambler, the Vampire... I can get into this a little later. But suffice it to say that we, essentially, walk around with a narcissistic ego that is SO terrified of not being Enough that it likes to overcompensate ... and say, "you need THIS and this and this to be Enough", and so we state our RIGHTS to others -- usually our partners -- "I need THIS from you to survive, otherwise I'm walking away". And we don't open ourselves to their needs.
In a word, we have this entitlement that the Narcissistic Ego likes to perpetuate.
Now why is it so fitting that this week is one to tackle weaknesses? Because this morning, when Caroline was speaking about this entitlement that we carry around, I got this feeling that was like, goosebumps combined with upchuck. It was a strong call to action... that THIS is what has been getting in the way of my financial abundance and success with my career. And I resolved that this was the next stage for me to work on: becoming aware of, and combatting my "demons", as Caroline calls them.
So after a lovely chat with Ms. Marion Piper, and heading to the blog, what crosses my consciousness but... "tackling weaknesses". Meant to be, much?
So here's to a kick-ass week. Thank you for being readers on this journey. It's nice to have something to feel accountable to. Much love, light, and good vibes -- have an INCREDIBLE, strength-filled week and we'll see you next week (however light and drugged up the post may be!)
Sunday, March 6, 2011
Woo hoo! First off, need a little celebration that I've made it through ONE MONTH! That's a quarter of the way through! Even though I haven't been perfect -- far from it, actually -- I'm still going forward. And those times when I take a couple days off, and though I've seen very few tangible results, I still have a strong underlying faith that this is my path. Month 1 has been a month of trial & error... month 2 is about determination and discipline.
Also -- can I just say -- it's exciting to be posting ON TIME, for once. I feel like the worst of the emotional storm has come and passed... at least I hope so. I do know that I feel energized and motivated to cross things off the to-do list, which is more than I can say over the past couple of days (weeks even?) -- so I don't want to jinx anything. One day at a time, right?
So to recap over this past week:
PHYSICAL BODY: I'm pretty sure I've gained. Alas. I've been on set (more about that later), and let me tell you: there is an overwhelming abundance of food in that extra tent... enough that could feed small villages for days I am sure! And with the emotional ick that I've been feeling, there's been much of self-medicating. That being said, the physical body has been falling by the wayside though there has been advancement in other areas.
HEALTH & ENERGY: Doing night shoots over the past week has really done a number on my Circadian cycle. That being said. As I write below, it was extremely re-inspiring to be around movie stars and movie people who are incredibly successful and lovely.
CREATIVE ACCOMPLISHMENTS: I worked on set, doing my 2nd background gig ever, for a major film. I submitted my show to a festival. I watched a great deal of TV and movies (not sure if those are Accomplishments, per se, seeings how they were me being both exhausted and hiding from emotions, but sometimes I watched them with an objective eye so i'll call those creative accomplishments!)
SELF-ESTEEM: I met some truly rad people on set, and it made me very happy to be me during that time on set.
FINANCE & CAREER: I REALLY realized how much I love being on set. I know that as background, I don't do a whole lot... but just hanging around, and watching all these people being so passionate about working for 12-13 hours at a time, to make a movie... it was EXTREMELY re-inspiring.
GOOD VIBES TO OTHERS: This was AWESOME!!! I want to do this again!!!! It's so easy. Honestly. I had 2 separate events with family members that were super painful, and I found that just thinking good things about them was helpful afterwords. Not sure if it made a difference, but it definitely helped me internally. I totally recommend this!
TRIBUTE TO MENTORS WEEK: OK so this week upcoming is about paying tribute to mentors. There are 2 ways I'd like to do this: first, to imitate mentors. (Because, as Marion pointed out earlier, imitation IS the best form of tribute/flattery!) I have a couple in mind that are SO incredible and confident -- ways that I would like to be -- so I'm going to have "Act like ______" days.
And second, to send emails, or other ways of directly paying tribute to them. I'm totally looking for ideas... I've posted on Facebook ... if any of you reading this have ideas, please comment or email me -- I'll let you know how this week goes!
As always, thanks for your love and support, and keep being strong! Month 2, here we come!
Lots of love,
Posted by Megan Phillips at 9:19 PM
Wednesday, March 2, 2011
Hello, friends. So my sincerest apologies for not responding to you when I said I would. 2 weeks in a row of not blogging! How bad am I!
I am writing this while waiting to go on set as a background “actor” (loosely used!) for a certain big film that is being shot in Vancouver. I made sure to bring my computer on set with me so that I would have NO CHOICE but to sit in front of it and write about the past couple of weeks!!
PHYSICAL BODY: So these past 2 weeks have been pretty emotional for me. I haven’t lost any weight, in fact I may have gained a pound or two. So the win for me lies in the fact that I haven’t backtracked too far, even in a time when I’ve really wanted to cling to the safety of food.
HEALTH & ENERGY: Until late this week, for the past 2 weeks I have been super committed to ensuring 30-45 mins of sweaty physical activity 6 times a week. Even though my food intake has been extremely poor, the afterglow of activity that I’ve been able to relish in has been wonderful. It’s given me a sheer strength that I otherwise wouldn’t have had. I can feel myself getting stronger, physically, and I gotta tell you it is a NICE feeling to trust my body again!
CREATIVE ACCOMPLISHMENTS: Week 2, I worked hard with a dramaturg on my solo show, and Week 3, I submitted it to a theatre festival. I’m really grateful that I got that submission done... there really is something to be said about having a deadline and a creative structure to aim towards. It was REALLY scary to submit my show – this baby of mine that I have held close to my heart for so many years – but in the end, I’m glad I did it. The more I get this work out there, the more I feel I’m freeing up spaced for more creative “children” to come to light! That being said, I’ve also noticed some major creative antagonism and sabotage, in both filling my body with junk (doesn’t do the physical body good that’s for sure!), and watching TV episodes back to back (lately it’s been finishing Season 1 of Fringe!)
SELF-ESTEEM: It’s been OK. I don’t want to get into what’s happened too much, but suffice it to say that it’s been an emotionally taxing 2 weeks. There has been an issue in my life that has been extremely emotional over the past 9 months, and just in the past 2 weeks it’s come to a head. I knew this was going to be an issue, but I didn’t realize it would affect me so hard. So merely the fact that I’ve been sticking to the plan, even the days I veer away, the fact that over the past 2 weeks I’ve come back even every couple of days has been incredible and I’m OK patting myself on the back for that.
FINANCE & CAREER: Ya know, I’ve been doing some work recommended by Stuart Wilde, a monetarily-inclined Spiritual Teacher for the past few weeks, and I’ve been starting to lose faith a little bit. I brainstorm almost daily about financially lucrative ideas, and I’ve brought these up with certain people, and although I feel more knowledgeable about some of these ideas, I still feel as if I’m treading water. So no real progress – that you can see, at least – on that front.
As for the Special Causes:. Week 2: FLIP SIDE WEEK .
I actually really liked this week. I’d like to carry forward some of the learnings that I took from it! One particular exercise that I came up with, while journaling one day in a cafe, was the following:
I chose as many areas in my life as possible that I was feeling crappy about. I pulled out my handy dandy journal and wrote the following:
“I feel crappy/sh*tty/icky about: _________”
I felt how that felt.
I then wrote the following sentence:
“In a perfect world, I would change this by...._________”
I sometimes wrote a couple of those sentences for each issue, and in one particular instance I wrote a paragraph. I then proceeded to continue with this formula for the remainder of the “I feel shitty about” list. And you know what’s crazy? I began to feel better.
See here’s the thing. I gave myself TOTAL permission to be as zany as possible on “I would change this by...” Allowing myself complete freedom to change my situation by zooming to the moon, for example. But what got crazy was that, when I had gone through my list and finished, I looked back... and even though it seemed TOTALLY CRAZY when I wrote it down... it actually wasn’t that crazy when I looked back at it. One of my answers was, “By talking to my boyfriend about this issue”. The only reason it felt crazy was because I was not in an emotional space enough to be able to even THINK about bringing it up with him... but by the time I’d finished the exercise, I’d raised my emotional vibration enough that it seemed like the perfect thing to do.
I discovered this late in the week. I had grand intentions of doing this exercise every day, but I forgot. Oops. Do not fret, however... this exercise WILL come back!
So that was the big golden nugget of Week 2. I’d love to take that one with me.
Week 3: PAY IT FORWARD WEEK
This one was somewhat the hardest yet. And to be honest, I actually forgot to Pay It Forward on a couple days. Some of my Pay It Forwards included holding a door for a woman with a big load, making dinner for a dear friend and giving her a container to take it home, helping a friend move, buying lunch for my mom when she had lost her wallet...
So although most of these are things that I would do anyway, it was actually kinda nice to celebrate a week of doing things for other people with absolutely NO intention of “getting it back”. I think that we forget that the little things we do can actually make big ripples. I forget, at least.
So that’s Week 2 and 3, dearies! Thank you for baring with me. Week 4 is GOOD VIBES TO PEOPLE week (No gossiping!), and I can’t TELL you how excited I am about that. So far so good, even surrounded by a whole whack of chatty kathies that usually I would LOVE to pick apart. (Err, ego would, that is!). So here’s to a whole week of throwing warm fuzzies at people, ESPECIALLY the ones who are mean to you!!
Posted by Megan Phillips at 12:47 PM
Monday, February 14, 2011
So it is officially Week 2. I was going to write last night, but I've had a whopping weekend involving ... well, ok, a great deal of Fringe episodes. And a whooole bunch of sugar on Saturday night. And that to-do list I procured on Thursday... Friday... Saturday? ... apparently watching Fringe episodes... and catching up on Private Practice... Off the Map... Grey's Anatomy... was FAR more important!!!
So a quick recap of this week: I certainly started with a bang: Monday-Friday was extremely strong. I felt extremely committed to this project, and shared this project with everybody I could in hopes of bringing some new recruits on board (if you've stumbled on this that would be YOU!).
I began a journal on Tuesday, as I felt it would be helpful to keep a physical piece of changes... adding a quantification to the process.
My daily checklists were fantastic from Monday-Friday, Sat/Sunday I began to slip a bit more.
Physical activity has been the easiest, with food being a close second. I keep forgetting gratitude... so the aim is to even just remember for one meal a day.
I've found it most difficult to do 1 creative and 1 financial action...making time to write has been challenging. And it feels ludicrous that this is so, especially since I'm not working... so where do my hours go?
CORRECT AND CONTINUE: for Week 2, I'm going to try checklisting ONE creative and ONE financial action, so I have 7 small ones by next week.
Physical Body - I've lost 3 pounds this week, and have had a whack of ideas racing through my already-busy mind in terms of finances.
Health & Energy -- Ummm... kinda lazy on the weekend. And now that's pulled a bit more into Monday... though, I think the time-off on the weekend allowed for some extra energy, at least to have a good workout.
Creative Accomplishments - I wrote a new timeline, but have definitely not put daily work into writing. I think for Week 2 I will aim for writing 3x/week instead of every day so I don't feel quite so bad.
Self-esteem feels pretty strong, all-around. I'd like to feel more achievement in terms of motivating myself to set goals instead of only achieving things when they're appointments
Finances - Very little change. I sold some electronics I've been meaning to sell, so that gave me a nice income buffer.
WEEKLY THEME: SERVICE:
Well, the only issue with this is that it wasn't really specific enough. Next time I do something like this, I will give myself daily goals. This next week will probably not be specific enough either... so I think I'll need to do some thinking as to how I can specify THINKING ON THE FLIP SIDE / NO COMPLAINING WEEK!
So... that's pretty much it. I hope that your week has gone well too! Please drop me a line... comment... message... let me know you're out there and rockin Week 2!!
Posted by Megan Phillips at 8:57 PM
Sunday, February 6, 2011
So. Just to be totally clear. Here are my 5 areas that I m looking forward to seeing changes in:
- Physical Body
- Health & Energy
- Creative Accomplishments
- Finances & Career
Daily Checklist (no matter what!):
- physical connection & activity
- food awareness & gratitude
- daily commitments for the day
- morning pages
- 3 finance/career actions/day
- 1 creative action/day
- nature appreciation
- visualization & imagery on each of 5 areas above
- With every interaction, think, "how can I give to this person in this transaction?"
- Flip Side Week (otherwise known as No Complaining Week). Also special note to be gentle to Self Week.
- Random Act of Kindness Week (or Pay-It-Forward Week). I'm aiming for at a bare minimum of 1/day... to friends, foe, and strangers.
- Good Vibes to People Week (Choose 1 person/day, and see that person surrounded in white light and getting all they deserve as much as possible throughout the day)
- Give tribute to Mentors Week (You remember WWJD? Substitute "J" for your mentor and act like they would... WW _ D?)
- Tackle my Weaknesses Week (Make a list of 7 Darknesses. Choose one per day. Devote each day to throwing every single tool I know of at it... affirmations, change of thoughts, change of actions, etc.)
- Eat only real, simple foods for a week. Also: goal to eat each meal doing nothing else except eating! No reading, no tv, just simple.
- Plan and make all meals at home for a week (no eating out... that includes Starbucks!)
**HALFWAY!... celebration and refection and correct/continue time!**
- Be Kind to the Environment Week (might become Bike Everywhere Week...maybe even Low-Electricity Week (ie... no TV week... gulp! ... keep ya posted)
- Switch It Up Week: do something new in everything... exercise, eating, route to work, daily routine... you name it!
- Simplify and Clear Space Week
- DO IT NOW week (otherwise known as No Procrastination Week)
- Confidence Week
- Marketing Myself Week: work on marketing projects I've been putting off (website updates much?!)
- Go out of Comfort Zone Week
- Notice the Changes and Love Yourself Week
**Also, THANKS to all the facebook peeps who posted their ideas... it was AWESOME to see everybody's ideas, and you can see I've shamelessly stolen some of them, thanks!*
Now. Rewards and punishments ideas (I don't know how much I'll be using them, but they're here just in case they work for anyone else?):
- Go to the spa/beauty parlour (mani, pedi, massage, etc.)
- Buy new music
- New clothing
- New Lush/Eco-friendly stuff
- Hang out at the SPCA with the puppies
- wake up extra early for meditation
- do Mike's chores for him
- clean out computer files, or other jobs I've been putting off
- donate money to a charity (alternative: put money in a jar and donate one big sum at the end)
- Do everything on the Daily List twice
- No TV
So.... that's the plan folks! Again, I am committing to blogging weekly (hopefully more!) and sharing my experiences. I'd love to hear comments if any of you try this -- even just a portion of it -- or if anyone out there has done something like this in the past, what has worked for them? I know this seems ambitious... but if I get to the end of the month and it's just too much, I will tone things down if needed. Or otherwise -- even more exciting -- if it just is so darned easy, I'll ramp up the changes.
Much, much love, and Happy 120 Days to Change!
Posted by Megan Phillips at 7:09 PM
Friday, February 4, 2011
So I've been clarifying just what, exactly, I want to put into the next 4 months. I have my 5 cornerstone themes I'm aiming to see improvement in. I've got daily actions aimed at each of them. I've been playing around with the idea of a weekly theme resulting in daily action (see yesterday's post), and some GREAT ideas have came flowing in on my facebook status (thanks peeps!). So I figured, why not give it some semblance of form, and have a MONTHLY theme, with weekly categories that come up?? (Again, I apologize for my micro-managerial tendencies that can pop up from time to time...don't worry... they'll soon pass...)
So on that note. Here's what I've got so far (any other ideas, I'm all ears!):
Month 1: Fresh, Eager, this-is-new-and-exciting energy
Month 2: In the Thick of It -- Keep your chin up and your head down, Kid (or something like that)
Month 3: Halfway--Take stock of where I'm at. Correct/revise/continue Game Plan
Month 4: TAKE 'ER HOME!
And as for Weekly Ideas, here's what I have chosen -- in no particular order:
- With every interaction, think, "how can I give to this person in this transaction?"
- Gratitude Week
- Flip Side Week (otherwise known as No Complaining Week)
- Random Act of Kindness Week (or Pay-It-Forward Week)
- Pray for/Meditate on/send good vibes to the same person every day
- Give tribute to a mentor Week (either same one, or 7 different ones!)
- Tackle my Weaknesses Week
- Eat only real food for a week
- Plan all meals for a week
- Be Kind to the Environment Week
- Go out of Comfort Zone Week
- Love Yourself Week (was gonna say Pleasure Yourself Week but I guess that's something different altogether... oh this is awkward)
- DO IT NOW week (otherwise known as No Procrastination Week)
- Confidence Week
- Marketing Myself Week: work on marketing projects I've been putting off (website updates much?!)
Lastly, I am aiming for at least 1 weekly check-in. The goal is to do a blog on Sunday night, with a recap of the previous week, and a more specific plan for the coming week. Because obviously, I've done all my planning in advance so there will be ABSOLUTELY NOTHING that will come up and knock my advance-well-thought-out plans out of the picture... ;)
I have taken an inventory of where I'm at NOW and where I want to be in 4 months. I found some areas easier than others to give basic numbers:
-the Physical Body was easiest to figure out. Numbers on a scale and the way I feel in jeans are pretty self-explanatory, and I've found in the past that when I stick to a simple plan, the numbers show for themselves... so I feel good about that. Simple, vegan foods, portion observance, intuitive eating, creative cooking, planning, and really paying attention to my thoughts & emotions while preparing and eating delicious food.
-Health & Vitality was a bit more difficult to add a quantum number to. All I could really decide was that I'd like to "feel more energetic". I think that to quantify this, over the weekend, I'm going to look at the ways I'm NOT health & vitality-full, and strategize how I DO want to be.
-Creative Accomplishments is scariest to work with. I have some ideas for scripts that have been kicking around. Actually writing a first draft?! Going from in-the-ethosphere to in-someones-hard-drive is a scary, scary thought. Nevertheless, 2 goals are written and in the book for May.
-Self-Esteem (inside & out): ok, this one kinda goes with Health & Vitality, but it's the internal manifestation. Since I've decided that I want to have my own business, I've had tonnes of ideas that have bubbled to the surface... but Mike put it best when he quoted Susan in the musical [title of show]:
The last vampire is the mother of all vampires and that is the vampire of despair.
It’ll wake you up at 4am to say things like:
Who do you think you’re kidding?
You look like a fool.
No matter how hard you try, you’ll never be good enough
Why is it that if some dude walked up to me on the subway platform
and said these things, I’d think he was a mentally ill asshole,
but if the vampire inside my head says it,
It’s the voice of reason.
so it was at that point I decided that Self-Esteem deserved a big ol' spot up here. So, again, hard to put in quantum measures... but, by May, I want to feel confidence and strength in places where I am currently feeling crippling self-defeatism.
-Finances: Ah yes, my good friend Moneybags and his doppelganger Visa card. At this point, I have debt that I would like to have totally managed by May. I am also currently unable to work my old jobs due to vocal issue... so I'm looking for creative income streams and a solid business idea and plan by May.
SO. I don't want to post too specific information here on this gargantuam Internet-thing ... I will share that info with close friends and colleagues, but I'd rather leave my goals general for now.
All right. So up to now, I've posted: inventory, monthly plan, weekly plan, daily plan. I'm also looking for rewards/punishments for each day... to help with the "motivation" factor ... although I much prefer the term "INSPIRATION" factor! I've posted for ideas on facebook... all ears for ideas!
Woo! Bring it on!
Love, light, and hugs that make you feel warm in your toes,
Posted by Megan Phillips at 11:13 PM
Thursday, February 3, 2011
So, been thinking more about the Weekly Challenges. I want something that has a recognizable weekly theme, with specific daily actions. I put an all-call out on Facebook and Twitter for ideas, so far, here are some ideas that I've had:
- Choose 4 themes and repeat them each 4 times
- Choose 8 themes and repeat them twice
- Choose 16 themes and have a new theme every week
- Choose a random number between 4 and 16 and repeat some/don't repeat others
Also, been working on my daily actions, and adding a quantum measurement to make my goals SMART (Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Realistic, with a Timeline... check here for more info). The...goal... (heheheh)... is to have these written down in concrete, specific steps by the weekend so I'm good to go for Monday! Adding specific details has always been somewhat of my downfall (more on downfalls/darknesses later).
ALSO, I am giving myself the BIGGEST pat on the back... I figured out how to add FB and Twitter "share" buttons! It was so exciting! So please add, like, and share to your heart's content... how awesome would it be if a whole bunch of us changed global consciousness just by striving to be our best Selves for 4 months?
Lotsa love and hugs,
Posted by Megan Phillips at 8:31 PM
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
So after a couple of days of reflection, I have decided to implement some goals and changes to kick-start forward motion.
Since being diagnosed with the vocal issue that kept me silent and forced me to cancel all my previous commitments (see my previous post!), I have found myself grappling with a fear that I am wasting all of this incredible free time that just fell on my lap. It really opened me up to how precious time is. I've spent a great deal of this time in reflection, journalling, taking Artist Dates, and watching a looooooot of TV.
As wonderful as this time is, I've also felt myself receding a bit. I realized that if it were up to me, I would spend my life indoors, listening to self-help audios, meditating, going to yoga or the gym, watching Grey's Anatomy, and eating delicious vegan food.
(I mean, really, I don't see anything wrong with that?!)
I was sitting down to eat a delicious lentil burger I made tonight, with a nagging sensation that there was something I should do. As I leaned over to turn on the newest Biggest Loser episode, a chill ran through my body....
... This is what I realized: It would be so, so easy to be this exact same person a year from now. If I continued to follow the exact same patterns as I have recently become aware of... Megan-from-the-future would be exactly the same as Megan-In-the-Present.
So here's what I'm thinking. After much brainstorming, I've decided on 5 major areas that I really look forward to improving. I'll list them here (not necessarily in order of importance!):
- Physical Body
- Health & Energy & Emotional Well-Being
- Creative Productivity
- Finances: grow income
- Internal Strength & Outside Generosity
The goal is to take daily action and one bigger weekly action for each item listed above. Daily actions will consist of:
-physical connection and activity
-food awareness and gratitude
-gratitude as often as I can remember
-daily commitments listed and marked off
Weekly items will change, depending on the week.
I am aiming to start this Monday, so I have some more time over the next few days to review and clarify. But if anyone wants to start a 120 day challenge with me on Monday... towards any topic of your choosing! ... Feel free to post or comment it... after all, it's proven that any goals stated publicly have a major advantage to ones that just get stuck in your head.
So very much love to you!!
Peace and light,
Posted by Megan Phillips at 9:30 PM
Monday, January 24, 2011
Hi! It's been a while. Sorry for the delay... I don't have a good excuse, except that I got busy. You deserve better, though :)
OK, so this post is about some pretty important stuff that's come up this past week. I was on doctor-ordered voice rest due to a bump of some form on my left vocal fold. A case of overworking myself physically, emotionally, and mentally, and not listening to the signs until it was too late.
So I had to release myself from all commitments... and spend 7 days with myself. Seven days. With myself. Most of the time in a confined space.
Now, I will say one thing: this was certainly not a true vipassana meditation because I definitely did a lot of things, and had to communicate with others through other methods (email, texts, etc). Because the voice rest came on quite suddenly, I still had a great deal of my life to organize and as much as I wanted to take the time to have Mind become completely silent (oh horrors!) I was unable to, due to not being completely ready for it.
HOWEVER. That being said, it has definitely been a huge and wonderful learning experience this past week.
You know, up until recently, I'd really started to lose sight of myself. Isn't it funny sometimes, the more action you take, the more you can lose sight of yourself? I'm taking action because I want to get where I want to be... yet, I took this action so far that I got sick and had to remove myself completely.
Of course... doesn't the Universe always give you what you asked for, just in a different way?
I've been looking to start taking time off my current life for a while... I just didn't know how. Part of me was starting to get frustrated and a little dead inside, much like that hamster on the wheel (a past life, perhaps??), the merry-go-round that doesn't let you get off. I saw a psychic the Friday before I found out all this stuff with my voice, on a very odd whim. (Seriously, I was walking to the car on Granville Island and something nudged me further on, further on, and further on still... until I was at the bottom of the psychic's staircase looking up. What's a girl to do!)
So he said some pretty powerful stuff concerning my upcoming direction. The two things he made note of were:
-to make time for my spiritual work
-focus on writing
(actually, what he said was, "You're a healer, girl! Share those gifts with the world!" a la Jack McFarland)
He also told me that a lot of my struggles were behind me, and now it's time to reap the benefits. (What does that even MEAN? I thought in my head)
So how does that relate to you? Well. I must share with you some of the pretty awesome revelations I've had over the past week.
- Creativity is awesome. I've had time to revisit certain passages/exercises of the Artist's Way (Julia Cameron... if you haven't read it... do it now!), specifically the morning pages (3 pages of longhand writing done first thing in the morning) and the artist date (1-2 hours of hanging out with your Inner Child). The point of morning pages to get your "chatter" out of the way so you can spend the day living in the present. Some people love it, some people hate it... but all I have to say is when I'm focused on "doing whatever it takes" to regain my creativity, 3 pages of longhand writing seem like a great way to get my own voice out of the way without other people having to listen to it! And the point of the artist date is to "fill the well" and remember what your little artist likes and doesn't (because ultimately, isn't it your perception that makes your own creativity unique?)
I've had a pretty great time remembering what it's like to write short stories just for the fun of it, or sketch pretty awful semblances of cups (or are they dogs? You can never tell when I'm done with it...) I have no idea where my writing will take me... but remembering the journey has been pretty incredible.
- Cleanliness is next to Godliness. You know, I totalled it up today, and I spent somewhere around 20 hours in the past week cleaning and organizing my place. You'd think I hadn't cleaned it since we moved in! But I read recently in Stuart Wilde's work that touching things will give them a life energy, regardless of what they are... and ya know, I haven't put this much love into a place... well... ever. For the first time since we've moved in (and even before then...) I am in love with the space I live in... simply because I'm finding my groove!
- Self-care is what it's cracked up to be. Oh my god. I'd forgotten what it was like to sleep until you wake up. Honestly. Since ... the summer... maybe? ... I hadn't had a day where I hadn't woken up to an alarm... and I certainly hadn't had more than 1 day in a row of having nothing planned except for what I've planned for myself. Meaning, being in control of my schedule gave me a feeling of empowerment that had been missing for a very long time... and the ability to sleep for the length of time my body asked for, to do little bits of stretching here and there... but mostly, to say nice things to yourself. For the first time in years, I've had the time to do an awesome, full meditation process in the morning.
And if you don't mind, I'm going to share with you a meditation technique that 2 wonderful people in my life, Julie and Matt, shared with me on the weekend. It goes like this:
1) put your hands on your heart
2) close your eyes
3) say/sing/whisper/chant/warble "I love you" to yourself for at least 1 minute.
I know, I know! It sounds cheesy! But I promise you--I promise you -- it works!
- Refresh, Re-inspire, Rinse, Repeat. I'd forgotten what it's like to observe my thoughts. Granted, (thankfully!), all the work I've been doing for the past 5 years is starting to take hold so I don't have to consciously think so much about creating my thoughts... but GEE WHIZ! Taking so much time hanging out with myself, I forgot how angry I can get when that douche cuts me off, or how selfish I can be when I'm eating, or how fear-prone I can get when I'm reviewing my finances. As much as I like to pretend I'm perfect... I forgot just how far from it I am! And, how much work it takes to change those deep-set thoughts...!
As always, I hope that my learnings can be of some use to you. The next upcoming weeks are going to be ones of sincere reflection, and as I intend to be a diligent client and listen to my "Just Jack" psychic, I will be focusing on how I can be of service in both writing and offerings of spiritual healing. So in other words, expect more blogs!
Love, blessings, and infinite gratitude,