Thursday, August 2, 2012

6 Years from the Day that Changed It All.

There it is, the hoof. The ankle. The extremity that causes me to limp occasionally, inspiring such hilarious original nicknames as "Hopalong Cassidy", or "Gangsta Walk".

6 Years ago, I was in London, UK. I was about to graduate Musical Theatre School in London. I was heading towards a path of staying in the country and becoming a working (famous?) actress. I was attending many dance classes a week, and had a lot of support behind me. And 6 years ago today, as I was running to catch the bus for one such dance class, a car came seemingly out of nowhere and parked on my left foot. I was in the hospital for 2 weeks, I had one surgery, and then 3 months later I had another, after returning to Vancouver, BC (Canada), where I am from, and got taken care of. I expected to recoup for 6 months then head back there. But that's not what happened.

I stayed in Vancouver. It didn't get better. It got arthritic. I started to limp, more and more. I did some shows and realized that I'm not physically even close to where I was before the accident. There is a great deal I cannot do, and even more that I should not try to do.

Lots of you know this story inside and out. Every year that goes by, I become more and more distanced from the Accident, and more solid in who I am - NOW. I am constantly meeting new (and connecting with old) peoples, teachers along the way.

So what's the purpose of the blog? All of the above, I've said a million times about it. I've written a show about it, for Chrissake. This story is my story, and it's formed life as I am.

I suppose I write this blog with the intention to state that this cycle is on its way out. It may not be OVER completely - there is always work to be done - but there is no deadweight holding me down anymore. There is no looking over my shoulder to see if the Guy Who Hit Me's Lawyers are secretly videotaping me to use in court. The crippling fear of not succeeding has nowhere near the strength it had in 2006. I have a partner who loves me, a show I'm proud of, and an incredible support system. I still have a foot that's my own foot.

Yes. I write this blog to say that I am ready to move forward. It's scary, but it's happening. And finally, I'm ready. Yes, and thank you.

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